The Therapy Crouch

The Therapy Crouch

Welcome to the Therapy Crouch! The smash hit podcast from Abbey Clancy and Peter Crouch. Join us on our weekly episodes where we will be exploring the trials and tribulations experienced by us, and you the listener, as we navigate our way through complex relationships.


Enter into our safe space where nothing is off limits and expect some tears, tantrums and plenty of laughs along the way.


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Episode's summary

Welcome to another episode of The Therapy Crouch! This week, Abbey is nursing a brutally symmetrical Portuguese mosquito bite while Pete returns from China to face some harsh truths from their seven-year-old son Jack, who has officially ruled out marriage for good. Plus, the debate turns heated as Pete's fresh moustache gets brutally compared to an 80s p*rn star and a swinger's retreat regular. We also dive into the eternal question every partner asks: why do retired footballers abandon the pitch just to obsess over golf? Pete reveals whether hitting a hole-in-one tops scoring a Premier League screamer, while Abbey explains why an immaculately organised airing cupboard gives her a bigger high than any sport on earth. Things take a chaotic turn when a listener submits a terrifying shower prank mishap that turned a romantic routine into a trip hazard, prompting an official crouch public safety announcement. If you want to submit an Agony Ab to the podcast - hit the link below…

Episodes

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"You Look Like A Swinger!" Abbey Roasts Pete's New Tash & Garage Disasters | AMA

Welcome to another episode of The Therapy Crouch! This week, Abbey is nursing a brutally symmetrical Portuguese mosquito bite while Pete returns from China to face some harsh truths from their seven-year-old son Jack, who has officially ruled out marriage for good. Plus, the debate turns heated as Pete's fresh moustache gets brutally compared to an 80s p*rn star and a swinger's retreat regular. We also dive into the eternal question every partner asks: why do retired footballers abandon the pitch just to obsess over golf? Pete reveals whether hitting a hole-in-one tops scoring a Premier League screamer, while Abbey explains why an immaculately organised airing cupboard gives her a bigger high than any sport on earth. Things take a chaotic turn when a listener submits a terrifying shower prank mishap that turned a romantic routine into a trip hazard, prompting an official crouch public safety announcement. If you want to submit an Agony Ab to the podcast - hit the link below…

29 Oct 2026
336-

Pete’s Terrifying New Look, Sexy Halloween Nightmares & Petty Candy Scandals!

We've taken over a friends studio for another episode of The Therapy Crouch! Pete has unveiled a brand-new moustache just in time for November, and let’s just say Abbey is far from impressed. From brutal roasts about whether it suits him to Abbey discovering a BBC study revealing that pet dogs are actually cleaner than men's facial hair, domestic harmony is truly hanging by a thread. The couple dive headfirst into the madness of Halloween preparations, debating proper etiquette around trick-or-treating, disastrous past outfits, and whether sexy costumes have gone entirely too far. Plus, Pete defends an emergency essentials trip to Decathlon, while Abbey questions why it's treated like a day out. Elsewhere, we hear wild celebrity trick-or-treating tales, discuss the logistics of couples costumes, and unpack an outrageous Agony Abs dilemma involving neighbourhood candy feuds and petty payback. Try Huel with £10 OFF for New Customers today using our code "therapycrouch" at huel.com/therapycrouch If you want to…

27 Oct 2026
335-

Pete Crouch Reveals The Worst Locker Room Prank That Went Way Too Far!

On this Ask Me Anything, Pete and Abbey are back tackling your wild Ask Me Anything dilemmas, from university pranks taken to sickening extremes to Pete getting completely stitched up with Deep Heat in the Stoke City changing rooms. Plus, Abbey exposes Pete's questionable choice of romantic bedroom music and the horrors of getting hammered together on date night. In this episode, the debate turns to relationship red flags when a listener asks how to save a best mate whose partner is alienating everyone, leaving Pete and Abbey to discuss whether you should ever tell a friend you hate their other half. We also tackle the return from an epic bedroom dry spell, how to rebuild confidence when things get awkward, and Abbey’s horror at Pete’s seduction tactics. If you want to submit a question to our next AMA - hit the link below https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1B-c3yvC-4Ew3H1nJc5fD-5d3X9JbK7L2mN1oP0qR8s/viewform 00:00 - Barn Banter & Where Is Gaz? 01:00 - The University Kahoot Prank 03:26 - A Step Too Far: Pete &…

22 Oct 2026
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Blind Date Waxing Nightmare, Turkey Pillows & The Brutal Family Roast!

We're back in the barn for another episode of The Therapy Crouch! Pete and Abbey unpack their scenic escape to Norway, surviving endless glasses of "bitch juice," and why Pete's post-golf hosting habits leave Abbey freezing in a house without furniture. Between Abbey attempting to cure a brutal hangover with raw sardines and Pete sleeping with a giant turkey-shaped ostrich pillow on his head, domestic harmony is truly hanging by a thread. The team break down the sheer chaos of half-term parenting, navigating four kids with zero overlapping interests, and the extreme parental lies used to keep the peace. Pete reveals why he abandoned Abbey mid-fall during a high-stakes game of 40-40 in the garden, while the pair make another high-stakes charity bet on whether they can survive the holidays completely sober. Plus, an incredible lineup of listener dilemmas in Weekly Wines and Agony Abs: from living with a flatmate who commentates every domestic chore like David Attenborough, to a blind date that goes horribly…

20 Oct 2026
332-

Abbey Grills Pete For Leaving Her Out Of The Podcast Awards! | Ask Me Anything

On this AMA episode of The Therapy Crouch, Pete and Abbey are back tackling your most pressing questions, starting with Pete awkwardly explaining why Abbey didn't get an enthusiastic invite to his upcoming podcast awards night. Between wardrobe disputes and chaotic rental living, the pair unpack the unfiltered reality of marriage when life gets messy. The debate moves straight into home renovations and whether living amongst dust, storage units, and builders at 7am completely destroys romance—with Abbey giving a brutally honest answer on what happens to the bedroom spark. Plus, the two go head-to-head on who is truly reckless with money: Pete's massive fun budgets or Abbey's uncompromising obsession with luxury kitchen ovens. Elsewhere, Pete and Abbey look back at their vow renewal on a private island, debate taking on The Traitors or Celebrity SAS, and sort out what Pete should wear to pick up an award. If you want to submit a question to our next AMA - hit the link below…

15 Oct 2026